About a month ago, I got a direct message from a non-follower who simply wrote the following… “You seem too fat to be a health food blogger”. At first, my heart sank into my stomach (because I am human), but then I just started hysterically laughing. I continued with my day by blocking him and deleting the message. I’m not going to show you a screenshot of the message because I didn’t take one. I did not take one because that man was not going to take any more of my time. I know my struggles and my strengths and I really don’t need validation or pity at this point in my life. But I know for a fact I am not alone. And I damn sure won’t be the last person to get a nasty message or comment of any kind. So I wanted to share my thoughts.
Now I would like to clarify that this post has been a long time coming. Not because I want to shine a light on miserable people spreading hate. But because I want every woman (and man) to kick ass in their own skin. My Confessions Of A Clean Foodie community know why we are here, and they know the goals we are trying to accomplish. I’ve been a bit hesitant to talk about this for a while now. Only because I do not want this space to become a place of negativity. However, we are not going to encourage people being idiots.
I’ve been trying to find the right words to express myself for so long. I decided to share a little of my story with you on Instagram. And after reading some of your struggles and stories, I decided to write this post. There are so many women and men who are so terrified of following their dreams simply because they are afraid of what others will say. Misery loves company and you giving into the negativity, only hurts you. Not them.
Now I thought long and hard about this post. But, then I also thought to myself why am I thinking so hard about how I am going to address bullies? Then I thought oh wait a minute, I’m thinking about it because I am a responsible human being. Something they can’t seem to do. It is so clear to me that people just say whatever they want just to get a rise out of you. Well, you aren’t getting that. However, I am going to explain to you why I am damn sure worthy of being whatever the hell I want to be.
BECAUSE I AM A FIGHTER
Every one of us has overcome hurdles in our lives. But through it all, we try to become better people. I am proud of who I am and where I am going. I’ve had to overcome a lot. Losing my Mother, not having an active Father, being a black woman, being a woman, being an immigrant and struggling with my weight (and that is not a plea for pity). But in all of that, I gained a wonderful mother and father in my Grandmother. I have amazing friends and I am a part of an amazing community. I have experiences and hurdles that are uniquely a part of me. Which allows me to have more compassion for those who are going through the same. I am hopefully able to help others in a very special way.
There are so many people who fight every day to change their lives. I hope my small contribution to this world helps others become better people. There is nothing better than hearing the stories of those I’ve connected with online. I only hope this community of beautiful souls continues to grow. We are all fighters.
BECAUSE I LOVE FOOD
My connection with and love of food is well, undeniable. I mean, child, I love me some food! I have had a very rocky relationship with food. For a long time, I simply used food as a source of comfort. But, I have learned to listen to my body through completing Whole30s and living a balanced and healthy lifestyle. Although I still have my days when I just want to curl up with a pint of ice cream, I now know how to change or balance those thoughts. But I have also learned to treat myself and LIVE! I love the fact that food can bring every culture, race, religion, and gender together. That is the one thing we all have in common. I get to celebrate life and relationships with the people I love through something I am so passionate about; real food.
BECAUSE I AM HERE TO EDUCATE YOU
The fact that some people believe we must look a certain way in order to be a part of a profession, a sport, a group, or even a relationship blows my mind. What gives you the right? Do you really believe I need to be a size two to be healthy? I don’t know what health professionals who’ve been consulting but honey they are lying to you!
“Healthy” is not a specific size, shape or weight. Healthy is how you live, and how you feel. HOW YOU TREAT OTHERS. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a size two. You ARE beautiful! At the same time, me wearing a size 12 to 14 is also a beautiful thing! I feel great. I know I’m on the right path. And whether I stay a size 14 or choose to be a size 6, that is my damn business. Whatever size I am, that doesn’t unqualify me as an educated woman. We are all on a journey and we have every right to enjoy it.
BECAUSE I AM FABULOUS
Yep! That’s right! I am fabulous! I’m living, loving, achieving, and building lifelong relationships. I’m not perfect but I believe I’m always growing. Whether I am reaching a new fitness goal, a career achievement, a relationship goal, or accomplishing a slam dunk recipe, I will always be me.
I truly strive to perfect everything I do. There is nothing a hater can say that will bring us down. You keep kicking ass and do not be afraid to speak your mind. Don’t let anyone label you a bitch or “angry”. Don’t entertain bullies but speak up for your beliefs because that’s all we have. Please feel free to ask me any questions and tell me your stories. You know how much I enjoy talking to you and hearing your wonderful stories.
You can read more about me HERE→